Oscar Live Blog part 2

9:07 - Jack Black glares at the man who stole his award.

9:08 - Peter Gabriel is looking so much like his old bandmate Phil Collins.

9:09 - Animated short: I call Waltz with Bashir.

9:10 - There's a cute Octopus movie that I don't know about? Also, I'm retarded, and have no idea that Waltz with Bashir isnt in this category. Screw you Oscars.

ps. Sank you. Sank you verry much. Sank you my pencil, sank you Suntory time. OH MY FUCKING GOD HE JUST DOMO ARIGATO'D MR. ROBOTO! YOU FUCKING RULE DUDE!!!!

9:12 - Commercial. Ok, now for a moment, let's address how different these Oscars are so far. First, Jackman is doing a great job. Witty, charming, singing dancing, adamantium claws, etc. The former best supporting actresses inducting a new one, (Did Whoopie win for Color Purple? Ghost? I don't remember), no clips on that one - just heartfelt discussion about the roles played. That was very classy. The stage is incredibly gorgeous, the bandstand on stage is very 1940's Bob Hope movie, and I love it. Finally - that Screenplay bit? That was awesome. They should do that for a DVD extra on some movie. So interesting to see how they take a line on a page and turn it into acting.

9:15 - We're back. Horseface and James Bond presenting.

9:16 - Art Direction. Time to go take that dump you've been holding off on. On the fun note - Being in Chicago last year and seeing where Batman was filmed? That was great. Damn city is just BIG.

9:18 - No one cares buddy. Make it snappy.

9:19 - Hey! Sarah Jessica! How many years old are you? *WHINNY* *Stomp, Stomp, Stomp*

Costume design? I don't even know who's nominated. I say Benjamin Button

9:21 - Can Keira Knightly act if she's not set in the past? Does she just forget how? Other than Love Actually, which is the best christmas movie in the last 20 years, name something else she's been in that does not involve a bustle.

9:22 - is this dude still talking?

9:23 - Make-up, I think Hellboy should get it, I kinda want Batman too, but I think Button will get it.

9:24 - Really? A movie about an old dude beats a movie about a gigantic fish man? And this dude is having a heart attack on stage. Quick hit to Brad Pitt - God, that damn hair. If I had 20 million per picture, I'd hire a dude just to make my hair that perfect.

9:25 - HEY VAMPIRE BOY. TRY TO LOOK SCARIER BY MAKING YOUR FOREHEAD WRINKLY. What, you couldn't shave? Seriously? Edward sucks. Yes I've read the first two of those books, and screw the vampires. Let's go Werewolves and Jacob.

Ps - the woman in Slumdog is damn stunning. We're in the Romance thing - which is cute, don't get me wrong - but don't they always complain about how long these shows are? You can cut this.

Pps - Can Zac Efron go the fuck away yet?

Ppps - No seriously. Go away.

9:31 - Natalie Portman and Jaquin Phoneix (Ben stiller). She's so pretty, in a normal way. Is Phoenix at home getting pissed right now?

Anyway - Cinematography - I say Slumdog for this one.

9:34 - Ok, Stiller watching the video? That was laugh out loud funny.

This is a really good Oscars.

Here's a question. Can't you combine Director and Cinematographer? I mean...isn't the director the one who's picking how to film something? I know, I know, I'm woefully ignorant in this info - and I'm sure lighting and all sorts of technical stuff come into it, but it just seems like you could lose this guy and do alright. You know? Bad economy - WHOA, the cinematographer guy has a milf wife. Go that guy.

9:37 - DOG COMMERCIAL! DOG! The Boston census thing thinks I have a dog. I've been looking under the bed and couch all damn day...no dog.

9:38 - Jessica Biehl is wearing a toga. Annnnnd this is boring. Sci-tech awards. Time to refill the drinks, and get another round of nachos.

9:40 - RDJr. and Foxx in the "Sweet Lord Let's Get An Oscar" movie.

9:42 - Stoner section - not funny, UNTIL Robert Downey! Sidenote: the commentary track on Tropic Thunder is him in character...oh wait...Franco's kissing men...hold on...HAHAHAHAAH. Subtle gay jokes. beautiful.

9:45 - That Sarah Marhall movie - that dude just waves that junk around all damn day huh?

9:46 - What the fuck is this award? Oh live action short. Whatever one is in french. Go.

9:47 - German one. Close the fuck enough. Franco might actually be high. What a shock, one with Nazis in it wins. Dude's wife is FREAKING OUT. Like Ricky Gervais said, you want some Oscar love, you do a flick with the Third Reich.

9:48 - Best supporting actor coming up. Let me just get this out now. I don't want Heath to win. Like, we get it. He died. It's terrible, but movie's like The Dark Knight don't get nominated for best actor awards, and I feel that this is a pity party now. Add in the fact that Robert Downey Jr. SHOULD have won for Chaplin (rent it. he's fucking unreal), and it makes you just go seriously? Hell, Downey did amazing in that role, but what about the poor guy out there that DIDNT get nominated so that a dead guy could.

The politics in these awards...bleh.

Anyway, Josh Brolin was damn impressive too.

sidenote again: Captain Mal is in a new show about a wisecracking writer. Can you just start designing shows for me personally?